October 2020 in Review

Posted on November 2, 2020 by Thistle

I feel like all my months have been reversed and thrown off this year. Likely due to the incessant everyone-is-always-home bit. (I have this funny story about how people were showing first-snowfall-of-the-year photos on Instagram, with captions groaning and saying things like “here we go again,” and it took me about a week to realize they were new-season snow and not late-spring-snowing-again photos. That’s how far OFF I am this year.) Anyway, for as pleasant as September was, with many good moments and lots of unseasonably nice weather, October tried to dive straight into the toilet on Day 1, when I woke to a data breach and ransomware on my computer. Sigh. Weeks of (unrelated) family issues and anxiety followed, as well as persistent 90+ degree temps, until the last week of the month. Sheesh.

Trying to look on the bright side, though. Ash has had some improvements, and we’ve now passed the 11 year mark with him in our home, rather than losing him early in the month as we suspected. Jason and I were able to vote early and safely. Laurence’s wisdom teeth surgery went well. I’ve had a lot of very lovely hikes with my friends, and I was able to safely visit with another old friend twice this month. I ended the month with a spooky nighttime hike to a local park thought to be haunted, which was just so awesome!

Reading and Watching
Like last month, my reading has focused on RIP-related books, and 7 of my 8 books were from that category. Ironically, my favorite book of the month wasn’t one I even put on the blog or toward that count. It was My Last Duchess by Eloisa James, a short prequel to her Wildes of Lindow Castle series, a silly romance series that I’ve found very fun to listen to over the years. Back in the day, I was all embarrassed about putting romance novels on my blog reading list so I just skipped over them. I really don’t care anymore, but I do care about consistency and so I’ve continued to just ignore them in my book counts. Shrug. It’s not like I’d have anything to say about each of them as a review – they’re just fun to read! In any case, since most of what I read this month was just okay, and I really enjoyed My Last Duchess, I’m claiming it as my favorite.

The family has continued to watch the newest episodes of the Great British Bake Off (of course!), and I quite enjoyed the next round of Unsolved Mysteries through Netflix. I hope to see the new remake/sequel/?? of The Craft once the cost comes down a bit, even though it would’ve been nice to see it during spooky-month. But the only Halloween-y movie my family watched was our traditional viewing of Hocus Pocus.

Goals
Meh. Not much to say here. I did spend about a month sitting down to write every day, starting in late September, but all I learned was that at present, I no longer even enjoy writing, which is not a feeling I’ve ever had before in my life. Maybe that’ll come back again one day. I hope. I’d like something of my longterm-self to have not been smashed to smithereens in 2014. (And oh the irony – Jason ordered an Astrohaus Freewrite Traveler several years ago for my birthday, and it finally came this month…right after I gave up daily writing sessions.) That’s really all I can say about my 2020 goals, which have been highly impacted by covid. As for my autumn bucket list, I’m doing quite well and on track to finish all 27 little tasks I set up for myself!

Health
My health suffered quite badly this month in a lot of ways. I mentioned in my September in Review post that I began taking a new injection medication that’s supposed to help regulate certain hormones. It’s a medication normally taken by people with diabetes, but is helpful for insulin-stabilization and weight loss in women with PCOS (me!). By the end of September, I was still on a very tiny dose that’s not even considered beneficial, but suddenly I was able to sleep again on my own for the first time in nine years. In October, I moved up to a slightly higher dose. Because I transitioned very slowly, I didn’t have the major side effects you normally get with increases in this med, but I did have a few negative impacts of my health.

First, I could hardly eat anything. Frankly, that’s what this med is supposed to do – curb your appetite by controlling hunger hormones and keeping food in your stomach for a prolonged period of time. The thought is that you’ll lose weight that way. Only that doesn’t work for me – if my calories drop below a certain threshold, I start gaining weight. Which I did. I was eating about a third of my normal daily diet (example: I only managed about a quarter of what’s on my plate in that picture), and gained about 3 lbs this month. Second, because I couldn’t eat enough, both my exercise and my sleep suffered. I’d lose steam partway through exercise, and I’d wake up in the middle of the night starving. It was the only time I ever felt any hunger at all. Third, if I ate anything with a lot of fiber – say, a small side salad – my stomach would go into full-on cramps for hours afterwards, as if it just couldn’t handle complex foods. Just like the last time I was on this medication, I began to crave processed food as a way of avoiding stomach pain. Not good! So I’ve dropped back to that lower dose of the medicine, and we’ll see what happens next.

Then there was my daily coffee consumptions, which nearly tripled for about 10 days mid-month when all the anxiety crashed down on me together, and I’m sure that also contributed to the weight gain, medicine issues, etc. Sigh.

Otherwise, I further overcomplicated my month by doing a whole hell of a lot more exercise than I should have (24 days, for over 24 hours total exercise, including 58 miles walked, run, or hiked). I’ve tired myself out (especially on the decreased calories), injured my formerly-broken foot, and pretty much felt like crap all month between the combo of extra coffee, reduced food, and increased exercise. The family-related anxiety and insomnia issues didn’t help, either. I’m aiming for a more moderate, controlled November, especially with my weight loss anniversary coming up on the 27th. I’m always a bit hyperaware of the date.

House
Most of the construction we were doing on the house got finished last month. Other than one issue with our month-old dishwasher breaking and needing the warranty people to come fix it, everything else we did was self-paced and done on our own. Jason has been working on building the deck, though it took until mid-month for him to get the wood for it. (We had to cancel three different orders from the first place because they kept saying the product was delivered when it hadn’t been, ugh.) The floor is mostly on now, and he’s currently trying to finish up the sides and stairs.

I’ve been working on the front yard landscaping. Costs haven’t been friendly the last few months, so I had to settle for just doing the path up the yard rather than both the path and seating area like originally intended. We managed to find a landscaping tool similar enough to a grub-hoe that I could remove the sod and break up the caliche ground mostly on my own. Jason put down landscaping fabric, and I laid out edging stone, gravel, and a stepping-stone path. It looks quite cute, and after Jason finishes the deck, he’s going to freehand paint some blossoms onto the stepping stones!

Things that worried me
The worrisome bits were the parts that made October difficult. Several members of my extended family came down with covid, and their exposure to other members of my family still hasn’t fully resolved, so we don’t know yet who all might get it, including some very vulnerable people. One of my best friends ended up in the hospital after her blood pressure soared to unimaginable heights just out of the blue (this pic –> is mere hours before the attack). Morrigan had some problems up in Kansas, though he seems to be doing well again. My grandfather has had major health problems including dangerous levels of edema and a fall that affected his pacemaker. Jason continues to get sick every few months (including October), likely a reaction to some of his medications, though his doctors have yet to figure it out despite many tests. (It’s quite unlike Jason, who used to never get sick.) Ash made some good progress in the early parts of the month, but then lapsed into eating very little again. There are speculations that the state won’t allow school districts the option of virtual schooling too much longer. That horrible woman got put on the Supreme Court through political manipulations of the GOP. Political crap is everywhere and I’m very, very worried about tomorrow’s election.

Highlights of October
It’s ironic that in a month with so many worries and frustrations, there’s also been a lot of nice moments. Here are some faves:

  • Halloween squishies!
  • getting together with Nat for the first time since March, and then a second gathering later in the month
  • Jason made the best hand pies with a stout-beef-and-veggie stew inside, mmm…
  • my Bridge Four poster arrived and it’s gorgeous
  • Ash actually playing and eating food!!!
  • “Orange is sus. Vote him out.” Ha!
  • the mayor’s safety guideline for Halloween, read with a completely straight face on air: “Avoid going into houses, especially if they are haunted.” Ha!
  • fun new crop top from Torrid
  • an amazing hike out at a near-ish State Natural Area, with a 400-ft climb into hills so misty we could see the fog blowing around us, and places deafeningly silent
  • the Pope endorsing same-sex civil unions – it’s not perfect by any means, but it’s far more than I ever thought I’d see the Catholic church do in my lifetime!
  • more foster kitten videos from my sister
  • a fireside night out with the family
  • first major cold front of the season, with temps in the 30s and 40s yay!
  • record voter turnout in SA, and many other places
  • a (safe, masked, small-group) girls’ night out to walk along the Riverwalk and then an outdoor dinner by an Ofrenda (see pic below); my dinner was SO good – if you’re ever in San Antonio, I highly recommend Mi Roti!
  • seriously, the meal was so good that it deserves its own bullet point: roti wrap with butter chicken, coconut rice, roasted Brussels sprouts, shredded cabbage, toasted corn, and avocado cream, with masala fries on the side. Mmmm…
  • Halloween Haunted Hike, complete with costumes, spooky ghost stories told on top of the hill, and running into multiple cold spots on the way down!

Coming up in November
You know, I thought I’d participate in NaNoWriMo this month, but given the way things have gone with my experiment in returning to writing, I don’t think I will. I haven’t participated since November 2015. Maybe next year, assuming my desire ever returns? Instead, I’m going to focus on moderation, getting back into regular running again, and cutting my coffee down to none by the 27th (!!!). Plus of course there’ll be Thanksgiving, likely celebrated with immediate family only, or with extended family via Zoom. Kinda sad times ahead in that. Stupid covid. Fingers crossed we can get a vaccine in the next few months!

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Sunday Coffee – Wrapping Up RIP XV

Posted on November 1, 2020 by Thistle

Well, I didn’t get to read as many books this year as I wanted to for RIP XV. A lot of books were delayed in library holds, and I’ve just been reading so slow and casual this year. Though I did read quite a number – more than a third of this year’s total has been from the last two months, and all but two of those were for RIP! Here’s what I read, in order of reading:

  • Death Notice by Todd Ritter
  • Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia
  • The Haunting of Ashburn House by Darcy Coates
  • Gentlemen and Players by Joanne Harris (audio)
  • Troubled Blood by Robert Galbraith (audio)
  • The Whisper Man by Alex North
  • Bad Moon by Todd Ritter
  • Voices in the Snow by Darcy Coates
  • One by One by Ruth Ware
  • Forest of Souls by Lori Lee
  • The Night Swim by Megan Goldin
  • Murder on Cold Street by Sherry Thomas (audio)
  • The Searcher by Tana French (audio)

Of these, there was one reread, four new-to-me authors, three continuations of pre-RIP series, two books set in blizzards, and three books involving cold-case investigations. Other than the reread – a long time favorite – I honestly would have difficulty in choosing a favorite book. There were quite a lot of good ones, and several that were good with disappointing bits to them, but none that stood out as superb. So instead of picking a favorite, I’d have to say the one that was the best-written was The Searcher, and the one with the most striking RIP-esque feel was Voices in the Snow.

Likely I’ll continue with my RIP reading in the months to come, despite the event being officially over. There are just too many books that I’ve been holding out to read and couldn’t get to, and I don’t want to wait all the way until next year to read them!

As always, thank you to the wonderful bloggers who continue to run this event over the years, no matter how formal or informal!

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Race Report: Dia de los Muertos (Virtual) 5K

Posted on October 30, 2020 by Thistle

When I signed up for the Dia de los Muertos Night Run 5K, it was still an in-person event. Of course, it had to go virtual as you might expect, and so back in September, they sent out our swag packages and changed the date from a specific day/time to “anytime from October 4 to November 4.” This really would’ve been a fun one to do in person – not least because I do not feel comfortable doing a run out at the park, alone, when it’s dark outside, and so I had to do it during the day instead. But also because many people dress up for this 5K (and others that the organizers host throughout the year), and it seems like a really awesome race environment. And, as I’ve said before, I’m not a fan of virtual races. They’re just all I can sign up for at the moment!

The swag package included a very soft, comfy shirt that sadly was WAY too small despite me sizing up! (see above) Sigh. It also included the race medal, and a bib that came with a dedication space. Being as this is a Day of the Dead run, it makes sense – running in honor of a loved one who has passed. I have quite a number of those now, sadly, but the person who came immediately to mind was my grandmother, who passed away in February 2018. She had been wheelchair-bound toward the end of her life, and had often been frustrated with her lack of mobility. She was also an amazing woman who taught me so much, and in many ways, I’m still reeling from her loss. I wanted to run this for her.

(2012 – 78th birthday party)

I meant to run this 5K early in October, but circumstances (mostly timing, family issues, and weather) kept intervening. Finally, I decided to just go get it done yesterday…which I admit, was probably a mistake. One of the circumstances holding me back was that I’d aggravated my formerly-broken left foot, and hadn’t had a chance to see my chiropractor to put my talus bone back in place. This affected my gait, which in turn gave me really severe calf pain in both legs from the very beginning of the run. The 5K route I have involves eight laps around my running park, and I was running roughly 2/3rds of each lap. By the time I finished the fourth lap, I literally had to stop the timer and stretch. (One good thing about virtual runs, eh? I don’t care if this is technically cheating.) Even the stretching didn’t help, and by the time I finished two miles, I decided to walk the rest of the way to avoid further injury. It took over five hours for the cramps in my left calf to fully dissipate post-run. Oy.

But here’s what I will say. Despite the leg pain, it was a beautiful day for a run, and I feel like now I have a really good baseline as I re-begin my running training. I literally haven’t run outdoors once since my 5K in September, and barefoot indoor running isn’t exactly the same. It’s time to get my strength back, and I plan to go through the Couch to 5K program again – not to learn to run this time, but to try to improve my speed/endurance. I was happy to see that many of my run segments had paces in the 14- and 15-something per mile range, even though my overall 5K time was 53:20 (a 17:06/mi pace).

Afterwards I got pictures with my now-earned medal, and filled out my Running Bingo for this race. It feels a little weird to cross out my “night/dark” themed run when I ran this thing in the daylight, but again, I’m not comfortable with running alone in the dark and I don’t see in-person events happening again any time soon. This will have to do!

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A Witch in Time, by Constance Sayers

Posted on October 29, 2020 by Thistle

Helen is miserable post-divorce, and her first blind date doesn’t go well. In fact, it goes so poorly that she ends up meeting a man who claims to have known her for over 100 years and four lifetimes of heartache. Helen could just write him off as crazy, except these past lives are encroaching on her dreams, and the man is strangely compelling…

I don’t know why I do this to myself. There is some part of me that desperately loves reincarnation stories, especially reincarnation stories with star-crossed lovers, but that same part of me is always disappointed by what I read. That holds true here, too. The story was definitely not what I craved, and beyond that, it felt weird and scattered and clunky in a lot of ways that would have put me off even without my bizarre love-hate relationship with reincarnation. There were just so many things that felt off: extraneous detail that unnecessarily padded out the book; a present-day timeline that wasn’t very fleshed out; a weird love triangle where Helen (and her past-selves) seemed to have no real opinion as to where her love should end up. The past-life stories were actually quite interesting, and maybe in another format and without the weird love triangle, I would have liked the book. But as it stands, I was disappointed. And also sad that it wasn’t spookier – I kinda expected a book about a witch and a curse to be RIP material, but the witch part was extremely minor (and not really important) and the curse wasn’t the spooky kind. Oh well.

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The Searcher, by Tana French (audio)

Posted on October 27, 2020 by Thistle

After his divorce and retirement from the police force, Cal buys up a dilapidated property in rural Ireland and dedicates himself to a quiet, peaceful life. But life in a small town is never the ideal people make it out to be. When a kid comes begging Cal to search for his missing older brother, he gets wrapped up in a web of secrets and violence that he never could have foreseen.

I don’t have much to say about this book. It’s unlike French’s crime series, and follows more in line with The Witch Elm as a thicker, more literary exploration of culture and secrets. However, unlike The Witch Elm (which I abandoned), the characters and story are quiet engaging. Slow and relaxed, but engaging. Honestly, I’m not sure I’d say that the end result had any real impact – I had times when I wondered what the purpose of the story was – but I enjoyed it nonetheless. It was almost slice-of-life with a dash of intrigue and a little of changing-personal-codes along the way. There were definitely thematic elements, but they were subtle things, and I found myself listening more for the rhythm and flow than anything else. It helped that the audio narrator, Roger Clark, was brilliant. So would I recommend it? Unsure. I personally enjoyed it, but I think it would be hit or miss with many people. Interestingly, I do feel this one will stick with me over time, and that helps me to land on the “hit” side.

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Murder on Cold Street, by Sherry Thomas (audio)

Posted on October 26, 2020 by Thistle

This is the fifth book in the Lady Sherlock series. Inspector Treadles has been accused of murdering two men, and his wife has engaged Sherlock (aka Charlotte) to find the truth and set him free.

So I have to laugh at myself a little here. It took me several weeks to listen to this book. I kept turning it on, and I’d hear these familiar characters and feel connected to them, but then I’d heard bits of plot elements from prior books and struggle to remember what the heck they were talking about. I thought I’d remembered the series pretty well, but I guess not, I thought. So before writing up this review, I went back to see my thoughts on prior books. Turns out, I read the first three books in 2018, almost back to back, and then read the fourth when it released last year. It’s this fourth book (The Art of Theft) that I kept missing stuff from, and when I went back to read my review, it was a big long explanation of how chaos was happening in my house so I didn’t really process the book while I was reading it. Apparently, I’d already forgotten most of it in the few days between finishing and writing the review! I even claimed I’d go back and reread before the 5th book, and possibly re-review. Snort. I’d completely forgotten that that was even a thing.

Um, no, I didn’t go back and reread the 4th book, and that made the reading of the 5th book a little more difficult. I kept disengaging as I tried to remember how things were fitting together. But still, it was a good book, and I continue to enjoy the series. Plus Kate Reading could practically read the phone book and I’d listen at this point. She’s just an amazing audio narrator and I can’t recommend her performances enough!

A quick note on one lovely thing in this volume. All the Lady Sherlock books deal with gender roles and how limiting they were for women during the time period. Thomas rubbed against this particularly hard in this book, including a womanizer and scumbag as one of the men Treadles is accused of murdering, and added more on the discrimination against folks of non-anglo descent as well. In the current political climate, I appreciate authors tackling many of our modern-day issues in these other settings, especially when they come off as completely time/setting-appropriate rather than heavy-handed commentary. Thomas pulls off this balance very well.

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Sunday Coffee – Searching for Clarity

Posted on October 25, 2020 by Thistle

CW: mental health, anxiety, disordered thinking/behavior.

There is something I’ve needed to do for a very long time, but haven’t yet been able to do. I need to, and I even want to, yet every day I put it off or ignore it. It’s often like this for me with addictive behaviors: an out of control feeling of inevitability, recklessness, self-harm, and irresistibility. Until one day I reach some invisible barrier and pass through to the other side, in control again. It is NOT a pleasant cycle.

I’ve been reading my tarot a lot lately, trying to puzzle out what I can do to stop the cycle instead of spending another few months/years wrestling with this particular disordered behavior. Each reading gets a little clearer, and this last was very straightforward.

(Raven’s Prophecy Tarot Deck)

I’m currently in a place of abundant support and connections, crossed by carrying a load of potential. This seems contradictory at first, but the point is that I’m holding onto the potential, rather than acting on it. Remember that I already know what I need to do – I’m just not doing it. And this thing I’m not doing is affecting my ability to be at full peace in my current situation – which is, notably, a wonderful place to be! I definitely want to be at full peace with it, and to experience my Ten of Cups without things holding me back!

My deep brain is obsessed with rest and recuperation, with letting myself take the easiest path in order to stay away from all things hard and painful. This is a longtime trauma response that has been lingering for six years now. In a more active part of my brain, my current thoughts on this particular situation involve hitting rock bottom. The Ten of Swords is particularly terrible, and in the past, the mental cycle spirals down to this low point before resolving. Hence the many, many tarot readings on this same question. There is a big part of me that believes this is the only way through – to let time naturally ground me down until I cycle back to normal again. This is the same part that fears looking to someone for advice, because that advice might simply inspire false hope and keep the cycle going for that much longer. In reality, what I need is to embrace that fledgling part of my soul that I’ve rediscovered in the last ten months, and step out of the prison I’ve created for myself.

The Eight of Swords – this is MY card, the one I connected with instantly when I picked up my first tarot deck (Medieval Scapini) over 20 years ago. –> Blindness. Learned helplessness. Locked in a prison, but a single glance would reveal that the bars are so wide that you can simply walk out between them. But you have to look. This is a card that says the answer is obvious, if you just open your eyes. Whenever this card shows up in my readings, I know that I’m beating my head with overcomplications and mental fuckery. And its position in this spread says that keeping myself in this self-made prison is absolutely the worst possible thing I can do.

So what steps do I need to take? Well, I need to sit with my anxiety, instead of letting that rest-and-recuperate instinct take over. The trauma I’m fighting is very far in the past. I can sit with that anxiety and see the truth underneath it, cutting the lingering emotion away, in a careful and methodical excision. I will also need to undergo a physical and/or financial setback in doing this, which makes perfect sense with regards to the thing I need to do. It’s not going to be pleasant, especially to my body. But if I manage to take those steps, what follows is the nostalgia card.

Nostalgia has always played a big part in my life, and I could choose to interpret this last card in two ways. First, if I follow through with my action steps, I will return to a version of myself that I view as more innocent and carefree (not that I actually was, only that it feels so in nostalgia). Or, my action steps will lead me onto a path that will create new nostalgia for my future. Like one of my favorite quotes from Brandon Sanderson’s Oathbringer: “The trick to happiness wasn’t in freezing every momentary pleasure and clinging to each one, but in assuring one’s life would produce many future moments to anticipate.” Either of these two outcomes are desirable – I just have to follow through first.

Now my head understands. Any further tarot readings on said question would be superfluous. Hopefully this means that I will Do The Thing. Soon.

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Quarantine Diaries – Weeks 30 to 32

Posted on October 23, 2020 by Thistle

A lot of the country is seeing a third wave and/or surge in the virus right now. San Antonio is trying to keep things together, but it’s hard given some of the conditions at present. Schools, at university level and below, are letting students in at quick rates, far quicker than is wise, but the public school system at least doesn’t have a choice in the matter per the state education department. Ever since the schools opened up in early September, we’ve seen our decreasing numbers flatten out and then start increasing again. It’s a slow trend so far, and technically we’re on a plateau now, but the city leaders are definitely preparing for another surge – especially as so much of the rest of TX is seeing that surge begin. It feels like we’re in “buckle up, it’s about to get wild” territory again, and frankly that just makes me really tired. I hope our area can keep it together and continue our plateau, if not lower it further. We’ll see.

(rolling average, Bexar County)

Week 30 – Oct 2nd to 8th: 59,323 cases; 1,171 deaths. Moving daily average this week was 144 cases (up a bit). Our positivity rate is currently at 4.9% – first time under 5% in months – but our 14-day case trend is currently on a slight incline and hospitals have been seesawing around the same numbers for weeks now. Makes it difficult to understand how schools are announcing that after only three days at Phase 3, they’re already moving to Phase 4 (20 kids per class) next week. “Phase 3 is going well,” they say. Um, dudes, it takes several weeks to know if this is going well! But considering they’ve gone from all-virtual to Phase 4 in less than a month, I’m not surprised by the announcement – nor am I surprised to learn that over 100 people have now been diagnosed with covid in the schools, half of which are students. Sigh.

The big news this week is that a pair of philanthropists in SA have partnered with the city to provide mass asymptomatic testing. Their lab was already helping poorer school districts with mass covid-testing with 24-hour turnaround, but they now have full FDA/CDC testing approval to do this on a larger scale, and are phasing it in to test over 12k folks a day if the demand is there for it. It’s really incredible what people can do if they use their massive wealth for the good of the community!! On the other end of things, a less charitable bajillionaire here – Pastor John Hagee, who runs a major megachurch and who has refused to follow any safety regulations, not to mention he sued to be able to open his church’s private schools despite the risks – has reaped the rewards of his narcissistic behavior and is now stricken with covid. Does that sound callous? Oh well. The man has said covid is God’s way of punishing the wicked, so fuck him.

Other news includes the discovery that city sanitation employees are cramming ten-to-a-van without masks (UGH), the governor is allowing bars to reopen if county judges opt in (thankfully ours isn’t yet), and the city isn’t canceling trick-or-treating (just providing guidelines for safety). At home, we actually had a bit of a riskier week, tbh: Ambrose spent the weekend with his friend Tyler, then Tyler came over for a few hours Sunday; my friends Nat and Chris came over Saturday; there were vet interactions for Ash; and my dental cleaning (can’t wear a mask for that!). (PS – masks were worn and we kept physically distant during all visits!)

Week 31 – Oct 9th to 15th: 60,258 cases, 1,209 deaths. Moving daily average this week was 134 cases, and our hospital levels have popped up to over 200 patients again. Our positivity rate is up slightly to 5.8%, following the same slightly-upward trend that has been going on for the last few weeks. It means that the recommendation for schools is no more than 6 folks to a classroom, but since they’re already at 15-about-to-be-20, I doubt the schools are going to pay any attention Metro Health. It’s really frustrating that the TEA took away the health authority’s jurisdiction on this. (Also found out this week that apparently all kids who want to be back in physical schools can return next week, as that’s the deadline TEA gave schools regardless of regional outbreak. Grr. Thank goodness that our district is still giving people the option to go virtually if wanted. And yes, Laurence will continue his schooling virtually!) We had some further stats info given out this week, regarding the entire first six months of the pandemic:

  • more than 1 in 5 cases (22%) in our county come from people in their 20s, and our pediatric rate (cases under age 20) remains around 15-16%
  • 75% of all cases are from Hispanic folks even though they only make up 60% of the city’s population (and some people claim systemic racism doesn’t exist…)
  • 20% of all hospitalizations have resulted in death
  • 70% of deaths are from folks with underlying conditions, especially diabetes (at which point, frickin’ Judge Wolff immediately equated “diabetes” with “obesity” and went on to again claim that obese people don’t exercise or eat well, fucking asshole…so I’m bringing back this photo from a few months ago –> )

Now let’s compare once again two rich folks and how they’re handling the pandemic. A former Spurs basketball player is hosting a large Halloween party here at a bar, despite all regulations. Face. Slam. On the other side, the owner of Shiner Beer Brewery is contributing $1m to the private lab that’s doing all the asymptomatic testing for schools. Who do you prefer?? Ugh.

Other news: The county judge decided to open bars after all, under specific strict guidelines. Probably barely matters given that 2500 of 3000 bars here already converted to “restaurant” status, and at the moment, only 10 of the remaining have applied for reopening. Early voting started this week, which meant super long lines outdoors in the heat with everyone trying to space six feet apart. I was able to vote; Jason is planning to do so next week. Schools here saw an increase in covid cases (as expected given the quick filling of classrooms!), which led to games and events being canceled or delayed. (Because of course football is still happening here – football is an integral part of high school in TX!) I’m not sure how they’re going to have a full season, though, just like watching all the NFL games get delayed and pushed out for the same reasons. It just doesn’t seem plausible to continue on like this! It’s a weird balance between trying to be safe and having some sense of normality.

On the home-front: Jason’s brother and his wife traveled down to Mexico on vacation this week on tickets they bought pre-pandemic. I had no idea Mexico would even allow visitors from the US at this point, and I was astonished that they actually went! We had another workman over, this time to fix the less-than-a-month-old dishwasher (the pump cracked, apparently). My cousin’s kid was tested for covid after developing flu symptoms; thankfully it came back negative. My grandfather is having a lot of major medical issues and it’s not looking good.

Week 32 – Oct 16th to 22nd: 64,014 cases, 1,232 deaths. Moving daily average this week is at 168 cases – numbers are definitely on the rise as this is the highest it’s been for awhile. Positivity rate didn’t change since last week. Hospitals are seeing a fluctuating change right around 200 people, not going down at all anymore. None of this bodes well! We have definitely plateaued, if not worse.

But San Antonio continues on. In fact, two major events are currently planning to go on as normal, with minimal changes for safety. The first is the Rock and Roll Marathon in December. They’ll stager start times, but there are thousands of people who participate in this, not to mention spectators. The second is the annual SA Stockshow and Rodeo in February. Much of this takes place outdoors, and the rest is moving outdoors, but it still draws hundreds of thousands of visitors and I can’t think it’s even slightly safe…hopefully there’ll be a vaccine by that time! Otherwise, the library system announced that it’s moving to Phase 3 of reopening, which as far as I can tell just means that the computers will be open by appointment only at all branches (instead of just a handful). I’m still trying to find out if this means they’re accepting volunteers now, because I’d really like to start doing that.

On the home-front: Jason got to vote this week. Laurence had his wisdom teeth surgery and that went well. Six students at our local high school tested positive for covid this week, so we’re SO glad that Laurence is still doing virtual classes! I had my first eating-in-a-restaurant experience since the pandemic hit us in March, a little sandwich shop in Bandera after a hike. Bandera County (the whole county, not just the one small town) has only had 178 cases and 8 deaths total during the pandemic, so this was relatively safe, though I admit that it was really unsettling that the employees weren’t bothering with masks. Neither were the customers (obviously they wouldn’t wear them while eating, but they didn’t wear them before/after either!). There was clearly no occupancy limit, either. We were the only ones in there when we arrived, but by the time we left, almost every table was taken. Oy.

Moving forward
Just trying to brace ourselves right now. It feels like we’re on the edge of a precipice, the same as it felt near the end of May when everyone kept saying that our increasing numbers were due to backlog, and yet the hospital numbers were going up, too. I’d really like to be able to continue our small, distanced hikes, and to see a few friends and family in safe ways. I’d like to maybe have my family over on the deck, if it’s finished, for Thanksgiving, outside and with masks and such, and that can’t happen if covid is exploding all over the place again. I know better than to hope people will be less risky, and I also know that some people flat-out don’t have a choice. It’s not like the government is helping all that much with lost wages or housing situations or anything. So I just have to hope that one of these hundreds of vaccine trials in the works will lead us to safety soon. And also that the election brings us competent leadership in a few weeks.

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The Night Swim, by Megan Goldin

Posted on October 21, 2020 by Thistle

Rachel runs a successful true crime podcast and is in the process of recording her next season, which follows a live case as it is tried. While she’s doing this, she’s approached via letter from a woman claiming that her sister was murdered 25 years earlier in this same town. Hannah begs Rachel to help her, and Rachel can’t help but to be intrigued, especially as the two crimes may not be as unrelated as they appear at first glance.

CW: rape.

Gotta admit, this one had a lot of flaws. I’m never a huge fan of books told in letters or journal entries or other untraditional prose, and there were letters, emails, and podcast transcripts here. Despite that, I didn’t mind the format too much, though honestly I could have done without the entire Hannah subplot – Rachel’s current case was already a full novel’s worth of information and intrigue. It’s also very politically charged, the coverage of a rape trial with two high-priced lawyers and a he said/she said back-and-forth narrative, Rachel trying to remain unbiased (but clearly leaning more toward the accuser in this case). All that would have been enough without Hannah’s subplot, which honestly not only felt superfluous, but a bit weird. This investigative journalist with good instincts just starts to follow directions left by an anonymous stalker in letters attached to her car or left in her hotel room? I mean, come on!

Then, there were just a lot of plot holes. Somehow Rachel finds evidence in the current case that the police missed – evidence, btw, that there’s absolutely NO WAY the police would actually have missed. I mean, it was self-evident long before Rachel even realized she had a lead! Not to mention minor discrepancies like the flip-flopping on whether or not the judge had ever had one of his decisions reversed (this changed like three times). Those smaller things didn’t really affect the story, but it certainly made the book feel less polished/edited. And the big ones were just a let down.

The Night Swim was easy enough to read quickly, and interesting enough to keep me engaged, but in the end, it wasn’t the best of stories for me.

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Forest of Souls, by Lori Lee

Posted on October 19, 2020 by Thistle

From Goodreads: Sirscha Ashwyn comes from nothing, but she’s intent on becoming something. After years of training to become the queen’s next royal spy, her plans are derailed when shamans attack and kill her best friend Saengo. And then Sirscha, somehow, restores Saengo to life. Unveiled as the first soulguide in living memory, Sirscha is summoned to the domain of the Spider King. For centuries, he has used his influence over the Dead Wood—an ancient forest possessed by souls—to enforce peace between the kingdoms. Now, with the trees growing wild and untamed, only a soulguide can restrain them. As war looms, Sirscha must master her newly awakened abilities before the trees shatter the brittle peace, or worse, claim Saengo, the friend she would die for.

I was iffy on starting this one. Could be good, could be a lot of overused tropes. I was tempted to give it up toward the beginning, because yeah, there are a lot of overused tropes, and there’s a lot about this book that feels very familiar. A “chosen one” type character (many books). A dark forest that impedes everything from warfare to trade (Shadow and Bone). Familiars (many books). An all-powerful queen set on destroying a particular race of people (many books). Even an ending that was extremely reminiscent of the first Mistborn novel. But once the story got going, I did get invested. The forest was creepy and intriguing. I liked many of the characters. I wanted to know what happened. Will I read the sequels? I’m not sure. It’ll depend on if this one sticks with me over time, I suppose.

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