Survive the Night, by Riley Sager

Posted on August 26, 2021 by Thistle

Charlie’s roommate and best friend, Maddy, was killed two months back by a serial killer. Charlie saw the killer, but she can’t remember anything about him. She lives with that guilt, and after those months, she can’t take it anymore. She can’t keep living in the same room she shared with Maddy, steeping in her own guilt for what she did and didn’t do that night. She agrees to a ride-share with a fellow student named Josh, a stranger who happened to be going the same way. Only after they’re driving away into the dark wilderness, some of what Josh says isn’t adding up, and Charlie is more and more convinced that she’s in a car with a killer.

So let me start with the good things about this book. It immediately hooks you. The writing is effortless, the story is good, and the pace is perfect. There’s also an immediate dip into 90s nostalgia, as this book takes place in ’91. Nirvana on cassette in an old Grand Am, passing mentions of Radioshack and other 90s staples. I was never big on 80s nostalgia because I dislike pretty much everything about the 80s, but I can dig the 90s version. I’ll be happy if a lot more books start coming out with that vibe!

Apart from that, though, the best thing about this book is Charlie’s mindset. While the word “schizophrenia” is never used, it’s clear from the very beginning that she has some sort of schizoaffective disorder. Ever since a traumatic loss in her adolescence, she’s experienced what she calls “movies” in her mind, where reality disappears for a few minutes and a more cinematic version plays out for her instead. It happens most when she’s upset or stressed. After Maddy’s death, it gets worse, and she’s prescribed medication…which she stops taking not long before this ride-share. And when you stop taking medication that’s supposed to help with hallucinations? Well, let’s just say your mind becomes very untrustworthy for a time as it adjusts. (Google Risperidone, for instance. It can help control hallucinations and dissociative symptoms, but if you stop taking it suddenly, it can cause a person to develop schizophrenia. !!!)

I loved the idea of a book using an unreliable narrator who doesn’t fully realize she’s unreliable. I loved the exploration of a person aware that their mind isn’t trustworthy, and is warring their instincts. From the beginning, you know that the driver 1) might turn out to be a killer, or 2) might be a harmless guy accidentally caught in the beam of another person’s psychiatric withdrawal symptoms. And I was just eating this up.

Until page 126.

After this paragraph, there will be spoilers, because I do want a place to discuss my feelings about the book. In a general sense, I was disappointed by a lot of things – the 90s nostalgia vibe disappears completely, so it becomes a “takes place before cell phones because that makes it easier” book; the so-obvious-you-can’t-believe-they’re-real “twists;” the extremely far-fetched plot devices to keep the story alive. I kept reading, but…meh. Anyway, spoilers ahead:

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Wellness Wednesday – A Coffee Update

Posted on August 25, 2021 by Thistle

Back in July, I gave up coffee. For several weeks, I refrained completely. There was one night near the end of July where I was really craving the taste, so I allowed myself to get an iced coffee from Dunkin. At that point, I decided that if I had a coffee every once in awhile, it would be okay. I’d grab one from the Dunkin across the street from my Airrosti therapist after a session. Or if I was craving the taste, I’d make myself a Japanese-style flash cold brew. It added up to once or twice a week, more once than twice, and I felt pretty balanced. I could keep off the addiction and still maybe have some periodically when I was out with friends or just really wanted some. The main thing I made sure of was to never have it more than once in a day, or two days in a row.

Last Monday (the 16th), Laurence started school. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: August is one of my not-so-mentally-healthy months. Over the last few weeks, I’ve had a lot of disconnect-depression, with some severe anxiety spikes and PTSD triggers. The extra stress of him going back to school – in a pandemic, with no mask mandate – inflamed my already high anxiety levels. Even though I’d made myself a cold brew on Sunday, I stopped by Dunkin after my Airrosti appointment that Monday. Iced coffee, two days in a row, despite my former insistence on not doing this.

No, it didn’t immediately lead to a relapse in addiction or anything like that. Instead, I woke up at 1am that night with pain all over my body. At first, I thought it was from the airrosti treatment, because we’d moved on to treating my right hip and a lot of the pain was coming from my hips. Then I realized that ALL my joints were hurting – from ankles to shoulders to wrists. They were all throbbing as if I’d done some heavy workouts with poor form and my whole body was suffering. I finally got back to sleep, restlessly, and woke up a further few times that night. The next morning, I told Jason that it felt like I had a hangover. The truth is, I’ve never actually had a true hangover because I drink so much water, so even when I’ve been at my most drunk, I’ve never had more than a yuck-mouth the next day. Which made that morning’s “hangover” particularly weird.

So that was Tuesday morning, and I hurt all day that day. Wednesday was a tiny bit better (at least I slept!). The pain felt like a combination of severe inflammation and dehydration. As I said in my last coffee post, I think I’m allergic to coffee. I didn’t have any of the pain symptoms after the few times I had a single serving of iced coffee over the last six weeks – they only arrived after I had coffee two days in a row for the first time. Coincidence? I don’t know. I also don’t know if this pain is an allergy symptom, or if my body reacts to coffee by becoming severely inflamed, or if it’s something else. All I know is that it’s definitely related to coffee. Not just because of this incident.

Late last week, after abstaining from coffee since Monday, I had a severe PTSD anxiety attack. I was devolving into full-blown panic attack, and had to make a decision. I still haven’t found a new anxiety coping mechanism, which means I fall back on either iced coffee, or an older coping mechanism of wine. Lesser of two evils, yeah? Maybe wine would have been better, but I instead I got a bottle of Stok from the grocery store. I filled up my giant thermos, and I drank, and slowly my anxiety ebbed away. The amount I drank was probably the equivalent of 2.5 of my normal mugs of iced coffee. And GAH I was in so much pain that night, waking up every half hour, aching all over, my bones and joints on fire. The next day, despite the pain, my anxiety was still BAD, and I had the rest of the bottle.

The pain finally disappeared three days later.

Because I’m me, I felt a third experiment was needed to confirm that this wasn’t all a coincidence. The day that the pain disappeared, I had a cup of iced coffee, with the intention to have it two days in a row again. Except because I had it so close to the last incident, one cup was enough, and again, that night I was in excruciating pain. Reaction = confirmed.

Again, I don’t know if this is an allergic reaction, or an inflammatory response, or something else I’m not educated enough to understand. But clearly, coffee is bad for me even on an occasional basis, if I’m not careful. And that probably means that even if I don’t experience pain, coffee is probably bad for me, even occasionally, period.

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The Heart Principle, by Helen Hoang

Posted on August 23, 2021 by Thistle

Anna is struggling. Her music career is on hold due to anxiety, and her longterm boyfriend has decided to “open their relationship” before committing. Anna decides to try out a dating app in a kind of revenge, and meets Quan. Quan is also struggling, through his trials involve a changed body post cancer treatments. The two of them both want only a one-night-stand…except things don’t really work out, not the first time, nor the second, nor the third… Then things get even more complicated when Anna’s family suffers a blow and she’s forced to return home to help.

I’ve read two of Hoang’s books before now and I was dying to get my hands on this one. Book of the Month to the rescue! I got this a few weeks before the actual publication date, and sped right through it. It was exactly what I needed. I loved revisiting old characters (Quan, Michael, Stella), and seeing Anna’s journey. Anna is only just discovering that she is on the autism spectrum, which is poorly studied in girls and women. Her journey – through anxiety, through self-discovery, through romance, through family hardships – feels very personal and well-drawn. It’s a romance book, yes, but with a much deeper undercurrent. And I loved that. It was exactly what I was looking for.

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Sunday Coffee – The Not-So-Ferals

Posted on August 22, 2021 by Thistle

A couple weeks back, I discussed the feral colony and the new kitten that had appeared in our yard (agh!) etc. There’s been no news since then. The little kitten didn’t appear again after I got the photo of him, even though we put out food daily for a week. We haven’t heard more from the neighbors on the colony either. This would be about the time we’d take in the new kittens, if we didn’t still have the original batch hanging around.

Speaking of which, I was going to include an update about the not-so-ferals in that same post, only it was already too long. And since it’s been over a month since I updated the blog about the babies at home, I figured it was about time.

Let’s start with Reaper. Reaper had FeLV, and went up to a foster in mid-July. A few days later, she showed up on their website, renamed “Meep Meep.” Less than a week later, her page was gone. I knew this meant she’d probably been adopted, but a part of me worried that she’d gotten sick (those lumps she had!) and was no longer adoptable (or worse, had to be put down). Yes, I’m a worrier. However, Jason contacted the agency two weeks ago to see if there was any room for our other three, and while the answer was still no, we did find out that Reaper aka Meep Meep was snatched up by an adopter almost immediately, and has a happy forever home. Yay!!

As for the other three, they saw the vet back on the 2nd for their next round of vaccines. At that point, the two boys were up to 5 lbs and Gherkin was up to 4.5 lbs. They were all completely healthy, and we got permission to start integrating them into the household. NOT because we planned to keep them – because no – but because they were getting too big to be confined to the one room. It took about a week for the integration to happen. At first it was just sniffing each other near the doorway of the kitten-room. The kittens were more open to the experience than the older cats, as one might expect. By the end of two weeks, however, everyone was doing well, even Jojo (who we expected would be a problem). Now that it’s been three, Atticus is cuddling and grooming the kittens as if they’ve been here all along, and no one else is much bothered by them. Plus, I’ve never seen the kittens happier than when they realized they had an entire house in which to have zoomies.

The kittens are all adjusting well. Angus, who was already the most attached to us, immediately became a full-blown house cat. He picked up behaviorisms within a day or two – winding in and out of your legs, jumping into your lap, begging to be picked up and held. Gherkin, who was always the most fearful and prefers cats to humans, immediately struck up friendships with as many of the adult cats as would let her. She tried to play with Jojo, cuddle-sleep with Atticus before he was ready, rub all over Nimi. For about a week, she wouldn’t let any of us near her except while in the kitten-room, her safe space. But then suddenly she began sleeping near my feet, jumping on the couch to sit near Jason, and eventually climbing into laps. She still has to be approached slowly and carefully or she’ll run, but she’s definitely transitioning to full-blown house cat as well. And then there’s Ghost, the follower of the group. He learns by observation, and once the other two were comfortable with laps, he started joining. Any time a sibling is cuddling (with cat or human), he jumps in for his share. He mimics the behaviors of our adult cats, including this interesting twitchy-back thing that Nimi does, and he’s coming along well. They’re all due for their next round of vaccines tomorrow.

As for where they’re going to live…well, Gherkin has a home lined up for mid-September. Jason’s coworker’s in-laws are taking her in. It’s just the boys who have yet to find homes. We nearly took them to the Humane Society to surrender them in early August, but we just couldn’t do it. It would be too traumatic for them. Then the agency that took in Reaper mentioned a facebook group for rehoming strays outside of the shelter system, so that’s our next move. We haven’t done it yet, mostly because the month has been busy and stressful, but we’ll get there. Eventually, they’ll find good homes. And no, they’re still not staying with us, no matter how attached Angus is. Our home is pushing the limits with our four cats. We cannot keep another kitten or two.

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Quarantine Diaries – Week 75

Posted on August 20, 2021 by Thistle

All right. Let’s start right in with lawsuit hopscotch here. Get your popcorn.

When I left y’all at the end of week 74, SA had sued the state, gotten a temporary restraining order, and put in a mask mandate in schools. Since then, things continue to flip and flop and muddle about. On Friday, the attorney general asked the 4th court of appeals to knock down the TRO. However, it upheld the restraining order instead, clearing the way to keep the mask mandate through Monday’s court date. On Sunday evening, the TX supreme court put out an injunction to nullify the TRO pending Monday’s trial. The state argues that this means SA can’t have the mask mandate, while the city argues this doesn’t affect whether or not the health directive is still in place. Then on Monday, the lower court trial took place, and the district judge granted another injunction against the governor, making the restraining order permanent, pending appeals. The city said “yes, mask mandate” and the state says “our injunction is bigger than yours.” Last night, the 4th court of appeals upheld the order again, so the RO is in effect until the next court date, December 13th. Of course, if the TX Supreme Court rules against us again and puts a stop on this RO, then we’re back where we were a few days ago. Pretty much, we’re going to change policies every three days or so.

The state is arguing that our mask mandate will “shatter” TX’s ability to respond to pandemic, though he can’t (or won’t) say why. The city is arguing that the governor is using a law that is meant to invoke emergency measures, not take away our ability to use them. Other school districts and counties across the state are suing the government, or downright ignoring his orders (including several in SA). A county judge has been removed in Dallas for defying the state order. The attorney general of TX is suing one of the school districts in SA because they’re requiring vaccines for employees under the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. A school district in Paris, TX, has made masks part of their dress code to get around the governor’s order, since he has no authority over school board decisions or leadership. People are getting quite clever out there! Meanwhile, the TEA has swerved sideways and changed their policies, now saying that school districts MUST notify teachers, staff, and families of all positive cases from school.

There’s really just so much going on right now that it’s been hard to keep up.

(TX current info)

In San Antonio numbers this week:

  • Cases: 268,970 (+11,176)
  • Deaths: 3,710 (+52)
  • Seven-day rolling average: 1,597 (+275/day)
  • Positivity rate: 16.9% (down 4.5%)*
  • Hospitalizations: 1,382 patients including 371 in ICU; 6% available bed capacity; note that roughly 200+ new patients are admitted per day, and about 10% are children
  • Vaccinations: 1,367,288 first dose (81.8%); 1,102,506 fully vaxxed (65.9%)**

*This is down because many schools went into session this week, so many employees were getting preemptive tests, bringing the overall positivity rate down.

**These percentages are of the eligible population – only around 50% of the full population of the city/county, including kids under 12, have been vaccinated.

The hospital situation is getting really bad. About a third of patients in the hospital are there for covid. Back in the winter, the state rule was that if the percentage of patients in hospital was over 15% for seven days in a row, capacity limits in restaurants etc had to be scaled back. But Abbott removed all of that when he banned masks in March, making it illegal to have limited occupancy level, so things just get worse and worse and worse…

(and vice versa)

Delta now makes up almost 100% of new cases nationwide, including here. Texas and Florida make up 40% of all hospitalizations in the country (go, bro-states!). We now have refrigerated morgues hanging around because things are just about to the point of needing them – and our county is still only the fourth highest in the state! Hell, we even got downgraded from severe (worsening) to severe (steady) this week, and yet things are just so bad. We still can’t get people to get vaccines. The city is in the process of getting approval to offer $100 HEB gift cards to people just to get their vaccines, and the county is giving $1000 refunds on health insurance for county employees who are fully vaccinated by the end of October. We’re paying people to get vaccines now.

Meanwhile, for the rest of us out there… The FDA has approved a third dose for immunocompromised folks and will start allowing boosters for people eight months out from their second shot starting Sept 20th. I’ll be eligible October 1st and will get it ASAP! Even without a $100 gift card. I don’t want to mess with f-ing Delta! Or future variants.

At home this week, Laurence went back to school (in a mask regardless of policies!). Ambrose’s college announced that most of their classes will be virtual for the first two weeks minimum, and while masks are optional, all students and staff must get weekly covid screenings if they’re on campus. Ambrose is very sad about this development. He really detests online school. (I am also really sad, as well as relieved. Just forget that whole thing I said on Sunday about having a few hours to myself a few times a week.) This week was also the last week of Gignacery frivolous outings. We bought movie tickets to see Free Guy a weeks ago, when things weren’t so dire. I decided to drop out, but Jason and the boys still went, in masks. I’m sad that days of doing things like this again are once again over.

Of course, the biggest news at home this week is in our school district. TBH, they’ve been bungling the whole thing. Last week, they announced that masks were required per the city. Parents complained, but they stuck to it. Then on Sunday, within minutes of the Supreme Court ruling, they reverted back to optional (with a bit of begging people to wear them). When Monday sided back with the city, we received a notice that they decided the state’s win superseded the city’s, and since they didn’t want to pinball back and forth in their policies, they were keeping masks optional. I can appreciate the desire not to pinball, but I do wish they’d chosen to land on the side of safety. Especially since they called for an emergency safety meeting only two days after the latest announcement, set for late last night. We’ll know soon what decisions they made, if any, to require masks or not. Perhaps we’ll pinball after all. Again.

Honestly, after some of the things I’ve heard coming from our school district, it doesn’t surprise me that they’re being so ambivalent. Somehow, they managed to have 77 students and 122 staff come down with covid last week, even though school wasn’t yet in session. (That’s just from extracurriculars like band camp plus teacher workshops.) They also held a convocation ceremony at one high school with 500 EMPLOYEES in attendance, masks optional, at the beginning of last week, and several positive cases were in that crowd. So not only were 500 folks exposed, the district refused to do any contact tracing! They said it’s “too difficult” when people aren’t wearing masks. Really?? What if some of those 500 PEOPLE are staff at my son’s school?? They’re just allowed to come to work without restrictions? Possibly exposing thousands more students? UGH.

Now, to finish out this week: Governor Abbott has covid. Of course, he’s fully vaxxed and has no symptoms and immediately got a third dose before FDA approval and special regeneron antibody treatment, so he’ll be fine. But he got covid after a big, crowded, maskless GOP convention, so…why am I not surprised?

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Wellness Wednesday – Hikes of 2021, #36-40

Posted on August 18, 2021 by Thistle

Compared to the early parts of the year, I’ve done just about no hiking for months! Most of what I’ve done has been at my local trails, so that gets repeated a lot here. But seriously, five hikes in over two months is uuuuuugh. Also, I really look forward to seeing some new parks soon.

36. After six weeks mostly off exercise, I decided to go for a short, gentle hike, to give my foot a try. Jason went with me, as I still had the bandages on my wrist, only one week out from surgery, and couldn’t drive yet. It was an event hike with lovely light, and we had fun noticing all these little things, like googly eyes on signs. I brought my telephoto lens and got a fun photo of the city skyline (about 20 miles away, but visible on the overlook in decent weather). [Hike 22/52 for my 52 Hike Challenge.]

Continue reading →

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Fitness for Every Body, by Meg Boggs

Posted on August 16, 2021 by Thistle

Subtitled: Strong, Confident, and Empowered at Any Size

I follow Meg Boggs on Instagram and enjoy her content for the most part. I’m not interested in the same kind of fitness as she is – heavy strength training and powerlifting – but it’s lovely to see some more body-inclusive folks showing that fitness is enjoyable and achievable for bodies of all shapes and sizes. I’ve worked hard to fill a lot of my social media with diverse bodies (sizes, abilities, genders, colors, etc), and Boggs was one of the first that I followed. I’ve been looking forward to her book for ages and was happy that my library put it on order.

So let me start by saying that I didn’t realize that this book was so heavily focused on an actual workout plan. The first 90 or so pages, plus the last 10, are about body-inclusivity and body image and fitness for every body, which (from the title), I kinda thought would be the focus of the entire book. The 90 pages in the middle, Part 5 of the book, is devoted entirely to strength training. There are tips about warmups, form, getting started, etc, plus a 12-week step-by-step workout plan complete with photos and descriptions of specific exercises.

I…basically skipped that entire section. There’s nothing wrong with it – in fact, as far as formatting goes, I appreciate the great detail Boggs went into. However, I have no interest in a heavy ST regimen, and even if I did, I have several already from other programs (like Girls Gone Strong) and don’t need another. I was really hoping for an entire book about body-inclusivity in fitness. So while the book itself was not bad at all, it was a bit disappointing for me, personally. All my own fault, really – even the back of the book description says that it includes step-by-step workout plans. I will say, though, that the parts that I was interested in were good, and that I trust Boggs enough to say that her training program is also probably great for folks who would like that part, too.

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Sunday Coffee – an everything slump

Posted on August 15, 2021 by Thistle

This week, I picked up a book that I’d had out from the library for a couple weeks: One Great Lie by Deb Caletti. I’d put off opening it, even though I normally love Caletti’s books. Maybe it wasn’t the right time. Her books are slow-burners, and maybe I needed something else. I read through a few pages, finally, and decided to return it to the library for now, without removing it from my TBR.

Then I picked up another book I’d had out for the same amount of time: Any Way the Wind Blows by Rainbow Rowell. Very different book – fantasy, humorous, fast-paced, and part of a series I already loved. Again, I decided to return it to the library after a few days, saving it on my TBR for another time. I just had no interest right now.

So yeah, it feels like a reading slump, only…it’s kinda not. Because I’m not really doing anything. I’m not exercising. I have no interest in writing in my daily journal (last written in on the 8th), which I’ve literally been keeping for a decade. I’m withdrawing from planned events. Not responding to emails. Not keeping up with my planner – last used on the 6th – or day-to-day stuff. I’m just…depressed, I guess. Not in the sad way of depression. Just in the “all I want to do is mindlessly stare at the TV or my phone and do nothing and then sleep” kind of depression. Everything feels pointless.

Ever since adolescence, I went through cycles of depression that would hit three months of the year: mid-January, April, and August. In adulthood, the January episode has trailed off. April and August remained miserable, depressed months, and it was very clear what the physical trigger was for these episodes. I suffer from a sort of reverse seasonal affective disorder, where I get really depressed throughout the summer. It has roots in the same cause – lack of sunlight – because it’s so hot for months on end that I very rarely go outside. Sunlight through windows isn’t the same. April is when the weather begins to turn hot. August is the hottest month and when we tend to have drought and relentless temps that don’t drop below 80 even at night.

In the last decade, things have changed a little. I went through some severe trauma in May 2014, May 2015, and May 2017. The April episode, while still there to some degree, has basically ceded to a full on PTSD episode in May. August has remained a blah month due to heat, and added some milder traumatic PTSD moments from 2014. However, starting in 2011, I continued to exercise outdoors all summer, so the sunlight portion of the depression wouldn’t be as prominent.

Only this year, it is, because I’ve been basically housebound since early May. I very rarely exercise, very rarely leave the house, and I avoid going outside at all costs. I stare out my window and take lots of lovely photos of butterflies in my garden, but I wouldn’t step onto the grass out there if you paid me. I can barely make myself go onto the deck periodically. It’s so hot, my body hurts, and I’m so tired. So I do nothing. And then the PTSD triggers pop up on top of the lack-of-sun and lack-of-movement, and I fall deeper, and deeper, and deeper.

Laurence starts school tomorrow, in person for the first time since 3/6/20. Ambrose starts school the week after that, and Jason is already going in to work for two days a week. Soon, I’ll have two days a week with about four hours of alone time, which is more than I’ve had in about 1.5 years. That will absolutely and definitely help. So will the nearing of September, and thinking about RIP season, and getting back into exercise again. Also, I really need to cut back on sugar. I’m eating way too much and sugar is a known depression trigger for me. (Not like I’m depressed or feel guilty for eating it; it literally affects my hormones and causes me to feel exhausted, mentally foggy, and unmotivated.)

Hopefully in the next few weeks, I’ll get myself back into a better headspace. It’s been a really hard year for me, one of those years where you get relentlessly ground down slowly but surely. I know a lot of people went through this in 2020, but up until about November/December last year, I actually had a great 2020. Ever since then, though, I’ve just been on a steady decline, and I really want to start climbing (literal and metaphorical) mountains again.

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Quarantine Diaries – Weeks 73 and 74

Posted on August 13, 2021 by Thistle

So. San Antonio is under heavy covid assault, a surge that is still toward its beginning and has already surpassed last July, and is likely only a week or two off from topping the January surge. Literally five weeks ago, we were in good shape. Delta is an incredibly contagious and potent variant, and now makes up 99% of new cases in Bexar County. With the hardheadedness of unvaccinated folks and the distribution of extreme misinformation, this is just going to keep getting worse. Buckle up.

Numbers
For some very basic information from the last two weeks:

  • Week 73 (ended 8/5): 248,184 cases, 3,624 deaths, 1,249 seven-day average (up over 500 per day in less than a week); 19.9% positivity rate (up 2.9%)
  • Week 74 (ended 8/12): 257,794 cases, 3,658 deaths, 1,322 seven-day average, 21.4% positivity rate

Vaccinations: As of yesterday, almost 80% of the eligible population here had received their first dose, and 64.5% have had their full doses. That sounds better than it really is – at the end of Week 67 (6/24), those numbers were at 73% and 58%. It hasn’t increased that much, especially given how crazy things have been over those seven weeks, but they did say this week that they’re starting to see an increase of 10-11k per week, thank goodness! Last week, I read that about 400k eligible folks in SA were still fully unvaccinated. Notably, the adult population with the lowest vaccinated percentage is the 19-29 year old age range.

Hospitals: Currently, we have 1267 folks in the hospital with 327 in ICU. At the end of June, there were around 140 people in the hospital, period, with less than 50 in ICU. The situation there is BAD. For example: There is an 11-month old in the hospital right now, as well as a four-year-old on a ventilator. !!! In fact, our news briefing last night said that 15% of yesterday’s hospital admissions were pediatric cases under 12 years old. Oy.

Of course, the majority of folks in the hospital are unvaccinated – latest number is 88%. The remaining 12% include folks who have only had a single dose as well as any full breakthrough cases. Only 5% of total covid cases are fully breakthrough (we were not told how many of these ended up in the hospital.) Deaths remain 99.5% among the unvaccinated, with only six breakthrough case deaths in our county. All six were among folks with multiple underlying conditions.

Local news
Things have gotten a bit exciting (aka convoluted and insane) here in SA. Here are a few highlights before I get to the big news:

Since the end of July, we’ve gone from “moderate” to “severe” levels, and I’d guess by next week or so, we’ll be in “critical.” Our hospitals are under extreme stress without enough staff to take care of patients. There have been so many 911 calls in for covid emergencies that on Wednesday this week, there was a full half hour where not a single EMS transport was available in the entire city. Not for traffic accidents, heart attacks, or any other reason. Hospitals have had to cut off elective surgeries again. Covid patients are being shunted into maternity wards because of the lack of beds. One hospital literally has ZERO pediatric ICU beds left. To make things worse, nurses are now being verbally and physically assaulted by patients and their families. They’ve literally had knives pulled on them and had to call police to come out. The hospitals are becoming a war zone.

Daily website updates have restarted – they were weekly since early June – and news briefs have popped up again twice a week just this week. A bunch of new events that had recently been announced have already been canceled or postponed. A new emergency alert popped up on all our phones on the 4th. The antibody treatment center re-opened after months of being shut down for lack of need. The state, which had for weeks refused to request help in the form of extra hospital staff, finally this week requested federal aid. The moratorium on evictions was set to expire and was saved at the 11th hour, with new protection until at least October.

But here’s the big one. The city and county filed a lawsuit challenging Abbott’s authority to suspend state laws that give local officials the authority to make emergency mandates in their area. It also asked for a temporary restraining order against the mandate, which if granted, would allow them to make a mask mandate for city/country employees and visitors, including public schools. The TRO was granted on Tuesday, and by that evening, a limited mask mandate was put in place.

In terms of schools, all students, staff, and visitors aged 2+ must wear a mask indoors. Schools must conduct contact tracing, notify parents in case of close contact, and quarantine folks who had close contact. Considering that the guidance from the Texas Education Agency (below) says that schools need to do LESS for covid than they have to do for lice, this is a big (if temporary) win. The situation will be revisited on Monday, at which time the TRO could be converted into a permanent injunction. That would of course be appealed and so on up the food chain, but at least when school starts on Monday, masks will be required regardless of vaccination status.

Texas and beyond
Several counties across TX have filed similar lawsuits and also been granted various levels of legal protection against Abbott’s stupidity. School districts across the state have come out and said they will openly defy his order regardless of legality. Public universities across the state are begging the government to let them make their own rules according to the situation in their area, but Abbot refuses to listen. Instead, he continues to yell his head off about personal freedom, and has passed increasingly strict regulations. He’s literally made it into law that private businesses can’t require masks or vaccines for employees if they do any business with the government. Any teacher who so much as asks a student to mask can be fined and fired. Any government official who defies his mandate can be immediately removed from office. (Judge Wolfe’s response: “If anyone needs to be removed from office, it’s the governor.”) All these mandates have President Biden opening criticizing Abbott, saying he should at least get out of the way if he won’t help. For a politician who claims to believe in the government staying out of everyone’s business, he sure wants to control every single aspect of the state!

But Texas is what it is. Texas and Florida – who seem to be in a hold-my-beer competition for how bad things can get in their states – how make up 1/3rd of all cases in the US. Only 44% of eligible Texas are fully vaccinated, and last week, a 45-year-old politician who liked to post “covid isn’t real” and “vaccine conspiracy” memes died of covid just a few days after contracting it. This sounds like a broken record by now, it’s happened so many times.

On the home-front
Most of what we’re dealing with at home right now is back-to-work and back-to-school. It does seem like a really weird time to implement these things, given the severity, but it is what it is. Jason is now going into work twice a week. Laurence starts school next Monday. He already went to a week of drama camp at the school, as well as getting school photos (pictured – this is what he had to wear, heh), supply shopping, etc. And he wore a mask through it all. My kid wears a mask even at the gym, which makes me such a proud mom. He wore it even during June when the rest of us relaxed a bit. Ambrose, who also wears a mask when he goes out, will begin a new semester at college, on campus this time, the week after that. Right now, the current TRO does not cover public higher education campuses, so they can’t require masks. I just hope Ambrose can stay safe.

Some good notes: Our school district immediately changed their guidelines to comply with the new order, and additionally set out a way for immunocompromised students who can’t get the vaccine to have virtual learning (despite the state refusing funding for this). Also, my little sister is off to college at Berkeley, where they require vaccines, masks, and tests for all students. Because, you know, they’re not insane or stupid or duped. Hopefully, she’ll be safe.

I’m so sick of misinformation and lies, y’all. I had a very frustrating conversation with my mom recently where she told me that the virus is only spreading through vaccinated folks now, because vaccine antibodies are where mutations come from. There’s really no explaining that that’s not really how science works. Sigh. Even worse, I had to drop a facebook acquaintance after she started spouting flat-out lies on my page. She claimed that 1) she was currently in the hospital and extremely ill with covid and pneumonia (and yet posting on FB??), 2) that she was the only unvaccinated covid patient there (sure…), and 3) all those poor vaccinated folks with covid looked just as bad as her except they felt worse because the government betrayed them by putting this poison in their bodies and telling them it would keep them safe when clearly it did no such thing. Oh, and 4) that the nurses were trying to convince her to get a covid shot but she refused, which is complete BS because you can’t get a covid shot while you’re in an active covid infection. I told a friend about her post, and her response was, “That sounds real,” and I couldn’t stop laughing. But seriously: goodbye, spreader-of-lies. I’m so done.

Moving forward
I guess we’ll see where this lawsuit goes. The governor is trying to go around the district court because he worries about his chances in the legal system. It’s going to be a dog fight either way. Gah. I’m so tired of this, y’all. Just get your damn vaccine and wear your mask and STFU so we can all get back to real life already.

Also: weekly Quarantine Diaries posts will have to resume. Sigh.

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New Header (at last!)

Posted on August 12, 2021 by Thistle

This morning, I looked out the window and saw a gorgeous butterfly in the flower garden right outside my bedroom. I couldn’t tell immediately if it was a gulf fritillary (which is one of the most common I see) with very distinct markings, or if it was a different fritillary variant. Turned out to be the former, but I got a very lovely photo of it while trying to determine this:

So lovely, in fact, that I realized it might work as a header for this blog. The former header was from 2017, and I was saying around my blogoversary this past February that it was outdated and needed a change. And after all, my blog name is The Zen Leaf, and this is a butterfly chilling on a zinnia petal…

After cropping it down to the right size, it turned out to be perfect. Will I keep it forever? Nah. But right now, it feels right. I really needed this little change.

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